My ongoing search for work.....

Well, it's January of the new year, and my situation is worsening. Making the decision to hold off on school for this upcoming semester and putting my dream on hold really hurt. But being an adult means that the choices can sometimes be really tough. It seems that all doors are either closed or closing on me, and I'm having problems motivating myself. Every day it becomes harder and harder. I have gotten financial help from my mom and a wonderful friend of mine, but it hurts to ask for it and hurts to accept it. I am bipolar and am always afraid of having a relapse. That only adds to my pressure and worry.

I'm reading a "non self-help" self-help book, and there's only one thing wrong with it, and most of the other books of this ilk: the author has a job or some means of financial support, has food, no worries about rent or car payments, and it generally in a happy place. That really doesn't offer me much right now. I would like to read a self-help book by someone who is really struggling and how they find a way to get through each day, with all the pressures and fears that being unemployed brings with it. Maybe I'll write that book someday...

Will the day never end?

Just my almost-second week at my new job (happy to have it) and I am already bored out of my mind! HELP!